Listen here.

A comment from Forrest of the Lonely Ice Floe

Why is it that the grass is greener on the other side?

Never assume anything based on appearances.

Don’t get too hyped up over this political season — the more things change the more they stay the same.

A little bit of Mario.

Call me: 206-350-0232

email: saturncast at gmail.com 

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Listen here.

Special Thanks to Matthew and Andy.

my god sits in the back of the limousine
my god comes in a wrapper of cellophane
my god pouts on the cover of the magazine
my god’s a shallow little bitch trying to make the scene

I have arrived and this time you should believe the hype
I listened to everyone now I know that everyone was right
I’ll be there for you as long as it works for me
I play a game
it’s called insincerity

starfuckers
starfuckers
starfuckers, inc.
starfuckers

I am every fucking thing and just a little more
I sold my soul but don’t you dare call me a whore
and when I suck you off not a drop will go to waste
it’s really not so bad you know once you get past the taste, yeah
(asskisser)

starfuckers
starfuckers
starfuckers, inc.
starfuckers

all our pain
how did you think we’d get by without you?
you’re so vain
I bet you think this song is about you
don’t you?
don’t you?
don’t you?
don’t you?

now I belong I’m one of the chosen ones
now I belong I’m one of the beautiful ones

Call Me: 206-350-0232

E-Mail saturncast at gmail.com

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Tragically, my old and trusty SATURNcast voiceline is no more.

(take this time to mourn)

Now that the mourning is over, I have a new voicemail number!

206-350-0232

Let’s welcome this new voicemail number by leaving a comment on it.

If you do, you will be on the SATURNcast.

How cool is that?

You can listen to Rings of Saturn #15 here.

Today I am pissed. Super pissed.

I start off the show by playing a portion of a speech by President John Kennedy to the press. (music by Smiling Cynic: Beautiful and Useless, off the Podsafe Music Network)

I discuss the fact that everyone is all giddy over the Democrats winning Congress. While I am happy about this, I do not think much will change at all. Remember Newt Gingrich’s Republican Revolution of 1994? It is all one big cycle. Only you can change the quality of your life.

I express total and absolute disgust that seven states: Virginia, South Carolina, Tennessee,Colorado, South Dakota, Wisconsin and Idaho all voted to ban same-sex marriage.

Even the Bean’s family voted for the same-sex marriage ban!

WHY ISN’T ANYONE TALKING ABOUT THIS? WHY IS NO ONE MAD? C’MON PEOPLE.

South Africa allowed same-sex marriage this week.

I play Jesus Loves Me by Jillian, off the Podsafe Music Network

PizzaBabe ticker-tape parade is this Sunday!

Listen to the ZillaFag Podcast
I was a complete jerk to the Bean this week. I am sorry Bean. (I was really, really nasty)

I share with you my bathroom horror story, which involved law enforcement, during the taping of last week’s podcast.

More music from Podsafe Music Network:

Goblin Attack by Second Symphony

Post Office Jesus by Little Fish/Big Pond

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If you did not know, today was election day in the United States.

Today, the Sun rose in the east and it set in the west.

The Earth revolved around the Sun.

Some people were born while others died.

Some of us were laid off from work, while others won the lottery.

You know what tomorrow will be?

The same.

As you watch some candidates give concession speeches, and others gush in the public adoration of victory, remember this:

The only person that can change the quality of your life is you. No one else. Period.

There is no one “perfect candidate” that will fix your woes.

There is no one “evil candidate” that you can blame all your problems on.

Candidates do not run for office to change the world. They do it out of ego.

Yes, some do end up making a difference but that is only a happy accident.

Please remember this as you sit glued to your tv watching the returns or spending all day in the rain passionately handing out your favorite candidate’s palm cards.

At the end of the day the only person you can count on is yourself.

Everything else is just entertainment while you wait for the Earth to continue its rotation. . .

Hear Rings of Saturn #13 here.

and. . .

have your heard the HALLOcast yet?

I start the show with some very good news:

I was honored to be invited to be a member of the The Freak Network.  Support the Freak Network.  Support independent podcasters.  Don’t let the corporate media dictate what you should think about.

While, I am honored that the PizzaBabe has asked me to join The Freak Network, it in no way changes the fact that she will have her SATURNcast Ticker Tape Parade (sponsored by Depends Underpants) on November 12.

I then begin to pour my heart out to you.

The Bean may have cancer. It was discovered in the very early, early pre-stages. (Thank God) but it means our chances of having biological children are very,very slim.  She is scheduled for surgery on December 6th.

I ramble about my feelings and throw a pity party.

I discuss how that whore Madonna is allowed to adopt without going through any of the normal procedures.

I discuss, how ironic that Apple, censors the word “sperm” to “s***m” on  Itunes.  Aren’t they selling red iPods to promote HIV/AIDS awareness?  Doesn’t it send a wrong message to censor words that need to be discussed in order to educate people about HIV/AIDS?

Bill O’Reilly, Wolf Blitzer, and the “Cheney girls“ Lynn and Mary drive me crazy.

I appluad Richard Bluestein and his podcast,Yeast Radio for interviewing a person of internatonial importance, Cindy Sheehan.  If more independent podcasters and bloggers did things like this, we could make a real dent on the corporate media.

While Richard Bluestein gave an excellent interview, and I admire Cindy Sheehan, I was very concerened over her answers.

Urging people to support irrelevant third party candidates is dangerous and irresponsible. Just ask Al Gore.

Even our good friend, Teddy Roosevelt found forming a viable third party impossible.

From the Podsafe Music Network

Fuck the RIAA by dotCommunist

Support the Truth by Jim’s Big Ego 

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Nice going Ralph. You were so brilliant, so “cutting edge” and just so uncompromisng, that it would have been a motral sin and an act against nature for you not to run for President in 2000.

Thanks. George Bush thanks you. The Republicans thank you. I am sure people dying now in a war thank you.

Now I am not giving a pass to Al Gore. He should have run a better campaign. I mean, he couldn’t even win his home state of Tennessee. The 2000 election should not have even come down to a nail-biting vote count in Florida.

But it did.

Al Gore would have become president had Ralph Nader used common sense rather than ego to run as the irrelevant Green Party president.

Ralph Nader likes to remind everyone that he is brilliant. He issues enough press releases and goes to enough book signings to remind us of that.

So, my loyal readers, he was smart enough to know he would never win the office of President of the United States as the Green Party candidate.

So why did he do it? Ego.

Well why did the Greens pick him? Whores. Wanted a big name to get their ideas and name across and to have enough people vote “Green” to get on ballots easier in the future. If they picked a normal “Jane or John” Smith person they never would have gotten the attention.

They got what they wanted, and now look who is in office. Their agenda (if they really cared about it at all) is back in stone ages under the Bush administration. So they hurt there own cause. Nice.

This is the problem with radical idealism. It is impractical. If you are a purist left wing liberal, or a purist right wing fundamental, you are impractical. You are simplistic and self-defeating.

And ego whores feed off impractical people.

Politics and policy is all about compromise and finding a middle ground that works for all and does not offend.

Yes, in the perfect world this should not be. But this is not a perfect world.

If you insist on being pure this is what happens. No middle ground. One side wins. And if your side loses you are stuck with nothing.

And we all suffer as a result.

And the cynical side of me thinks the Green Party likes this. A radical “enemy” in power, empowers them to be the “anti-enemy” and raises their media availablity. With a middle ground everyone can live with they are just a voice, one of many, urging a more radical agenda.

And if you disagree with me. That is fine. But next time something like this happens, and I am on the losing side of a “purist” fight; I blame you.

Thanks Ralph.

Learn how to run a campaign Al.