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Forrest misses her flight to Saturn

Andy Melton sends a may day distress call on the way to Saturn.

What is happiness?   Does it exist?

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Your recent comments trigger an angry flashback.

Where is my fame and glory?

I am Dutch.

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This episode is light and breezy.  No depressing stuff. Promise!

I was on the Pizzababe Goes Global podcast this week.

Rebecca Nay releases her Thailand video!

Tigger did a fantastic podcast about Alice and Albert’s morphine addiction.

Listen to the Freak Network

Did Andy Melton die in space?

Tigger finally got to talk to Bean.  His dream realized.  (Sorry AJ from cuppatea.us)

Matt from Spanking Bea Arthur is podcasting! He is also giving lame thank you’s for the wristwatch.

Hexagons on Saturn.  You guys FINALLY notice?

Zillafag quits smoking.

Shout-out to Dace.  Would it kill Dace to update his blog?

I give kudos to Bob for moving to Wisconsin and following his dream.

Arnold scams Newsweek.

A public service announcement telling you not to die an awful death.

Bye for now!

Guess the song and win a SATURNcast T-shirt! 

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Fine.

You do not write comments anymore.

You do not call.

And I can just give up ever thinking you will send me flowers.

What’s up with that?

Listen here.

Can you believe that this is the 30th Rings of Saturn SATURNcast?!!

That jerk, Issac Newton could never podcast for this long.

I want to thank all of you for your incredible support and kind words during the Bean and my attempt to adopt two little girls.

It means a great deal to us.

The Bean updates you all about what happened last Wednesday during our interview.

I promise not to bore you with adoption stories.

I read an infurating article from baby-boomers who claim the younger generation is far more selfish than they are.

POPPYCOCK!

Check out the new never before seen pictures from Saturn.

Listen to The Freak Network

Listen to John Ong’s wonderful Ongline Podcast

Leave me a voice mail at 206-338-2154

or email me at saturncast at gmail.com

I have the best fans in the world!

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V For Vendetta is an awsome book and movie.

An ode to the wristwatch. . .

Lawerence from South Africa calls the SATURNcast!  I am very honored.

You too can call the SATURNcast at 206-338-2154

Andy Melton designs a fantastic new look for the SATURNdiary.

Brittany Spears reminds me of my time in rehab — which I recount for all of you today.  It was a very scary time in my life.

Please send the Bean and I some positive mo-jo.  We are very close to adopting two little girls.

I love all of you.  Christiaan Huygens has the best listeners on Earth.

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a word of warning. . .

I am depressed today, and thus, so is the show. . .

I start the show with a happy announcement from the Bean

I Hate Sundays.  Hate.

I applaud Jen and Bob from the Pizzababe Goes Global podcast and Tigger from the Tiggercast for their strong words against homophobia and Tim Hardaway.

Homophobia and bigotry affects us all.

Why are we so cruel to each other?

I discuss irony and Madge Weinstein.

I feel sorry for Brittany Spears and Anna Nicole Smith

I am a sad sack today.

I promise to be happy next time. . .

From the Podsafe Music Network:

What if the Aliens Came? by Ian Knapp

So Many Different Ways I Can Kill You by Madsumo

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The show starts with a wonderful message from the lovely Cheryl Merkowski.

Guess the mystery speaker slamming Franklin Roosevelt and win a SATURNcast T-shirt!

I hate Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day etc. They are all made up holidays to give the card companies money. You should express your love because you love someone, not because society tells you too!!!

Remember when I talked about being addicted to a person? Well, NASA astronaut Lisa Nowak proves my theory. She threw away her entire life due to her addiction to a person.

She was also an overachiever — which can lead to real problems.

Trent Reznor is GOD.

I give you all a little history lesson on the Kennedy family. JFK had many faults, but I still like him.

Listen to the Mysterious Universe podcast.

I enjoyed my Skype call with Andy Melton, Dace, and Zillafag.

Zilla takes my side against the evil Bean. (finally, someone. . .)

E-mail me at Saturncast at gmail.com

Call me at (206) 338-2154.

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Today’s show is about the important need to stay positive and grateful for life — even when I want to feel sorry for myself.

We start the show with the latest installment of ANDY MELTON IN SPACE.

I play an audio clip from Tigger.

Special Delivery Mark does his best podcast ever.

Sir (cough) Issac Newton who “invented” gravity is an attention whore.

I invented the wristwastch. (where’s the thank you?)

I talk about my terrible habit of being nervous, cynical and sarcastic. I always look at life as “glass half empty”.

I used alcohol as a crutch. (What’s your crutch?)
I learned that I need to try and stay positive and be grateful for what I have in life in order to stay healthy.

It is the small things in life that will kill you.

I wished I followed my own advice. . .

Shout-outs

PizzaBabe and Bob

ZILLA

AJ

NiiceLady

The Gay Expat

AND DON’T FORGET NIK IN PARIS!!!

I end the show with a few poems from my favorite poet — Charles Bukowski.

Call my voice mail at 206-338-2154

Or email me at saturncast at gmail.com

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I am very passive-aggressive today.

You and I have not just sat down and talked in like, forever.

Kidney stone problem is still a problem.

Thanks to all of you who have reached out to see if I was ok.

The SATURNdiary was hacked on Sunday.

I hired Andy Melton to fix it and he did a fantastic job! I urge all of you to hire Andy when you need computer help.

PizzaBabe calls Bean a whore and a prude. . . Not a winning strategy.

Listen to the TiggerCast

Listen to AJ’s Cuppa Tea

Listen to Rebbecca Nay’s Tranny Wreck (She was mean and cranky on her last podcast)

Listen to the Gay Expat

Listen to the Freak Network

Why is it that I give all of you iTunes reviews but none of you have seen fit to give me one? (even a bad one! SHAME ON YOU)

Wal-Mart and Dunkin’ Donuts PC BS.

Red China is going to own space in 10 years. We are dumb-asses.

Madge Weinstein calls me a hater. So untrue.

Apple iPhone is useless.

Steve Jobs need a suit.

From the Podsafe Music Network: Uncle Seth — You Don’t Need an iPod.

Metalica sucks.

I think addicts need 12 step programs.

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